When bad authors go worse

It’s rare that something truly hysterical happens in the publishing industry. There’s exciting news, shocking news, sad news, but really, truly hysterical news? For that you generally have to go to politics/music/h’wood. Writers generally don’t have the large, obnoxious, delusionary personalities to tip the laughter scales, but then this weekend I came across the following articles (WARNING: the 3rd article is not for young readers):

This one is Nicholas Sparks and Miley Cyrus giving an interview to USA Today about THE LAST SONG (the movie? the book? who cares?). In it, Sparks compares himself to Aeschylus, Sophocles, Euripides, Jane Austen and Hemingway. Then he has the cojones to dis Cormac McCarthy. Sweet Lord.

This one is a review Roger Ebert gave of the movie, after the USA Today article came out, in which he b-slaps Sparks for dissing Cormac McCarthy. Hot.

And this one is a blogger’s article about both the USA Today article, Roger Ebert’s review of the movie, and links to another blog article and photo of Sparks, and I don’t really recommend reading this one unless you’re over 18. Except that it’s hysterical, and what I would write if I didn’t cater to young readers.

Don’t drink liquids while reading any of these articles. You’ve been warned.


4 thoughts on “When bad authors go worse

  1. Jenny says:

    In the USA Today interview, Nicholas Sparks is called a “North Carolina native.” As a native North Carolinian, I would like to vehemently state that Mr. Sparks is from Nebraska, not NC. While he resides in our fair state currently, we should not receive any credit for contributing to the drivel which he churns out.

    I’ve read Hemingway, Mr. Sparks, and you are no Hemingway!

  2. Tracey says:

    I would certainly never associate the egocentric and delusional Sparks with anyone from the fair state of North Carolina! Go Heels!

    I wonder if Karen has anything to say in defense of Nebraska? Go Huskers?

  3. Kathalina says:

    I almost bust out laughing when I read “No, the themes in love stories are different. In mine, you never know if it’s going to be a happy ending, sad ending, bittersweet or tragic. You read a romance because you know what to expect. You read a love story because you don’t know what to expect.” – with Sparks you always know what to expect, somone dies at the end. That’s his distinction between a love story and a romance??!

  4. Tracey says:

    If that’s not bad enough, you can get the super-easy 4 step method on how to make a sparks novel/movie right here: http://bit.ly/aM2Rk4

    Steps 5 & 6: getting a really original poster design and, of course, cashing in your well-deserved paycheck.

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